There is no one definition of virginity. Others may define virginity as never engaging in vaginal penetration with a penis, despite having had other types of sex, including oral stimulation and anal penetration. Some people may no longer call themselves a virgin after engaging in anal penetration or penetration with a finger or sex toy. Others may reconsider their virginity status after receiving or giving oral stimulation. Oh, the hymen — the stuff of legend. Depending on its size, a hymen can be torn during penetrative sex, exercise, or some other physical activity. Your hymen — like your finger or your ear — is just a body part. Plus, not everyone is born with a hymen, and if they are, it may be a very small piece of tissue.
Think about whether you're ready
1. Communicate what you want.
Back to Sexual health. When a woman has vaginal sex for the first time, it can be a little painful. You may also have some bleeding, but this isn't always the case. If bleeding happens, it's usually because your hymen has been broken during sexual intercourse. There are things you can do to lessen any pain, such as slow penetration and using a lot of water-based lubrication.
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Having sex for the first time is an important moment for most of us - it can open you up to a whole new world, bring you closer to your partner and give you a deeper understanding of your own body. To make this experience better and pain-free for you and your partner, there are some things you might want to consider. Sure, you might feel certain of it in your head at the moment but discussing it out loud can help process the decision on a deeper level. Read up about sexual intercourse, methods of protection, sexually transmitted diseases, sexual organs and erogenous zones. Then, make sure you have everything you could need like condoms and lubricants. The most important part about having sex — the first time, last time or any time in between — is consent. There will be some people who will try to downplay it or joke about it. Reconsider your decision if you feel unsafe at any point. No means no, stop means stop - make sure your partner understands and respects that. When it comes to your physical and mental health, though, knowing that you can trust this person may make the experience a lot better and safer for you.
Find out more about cookies and your privacy in our policy. ReachOut are running a new wave of recruitment for research about our users and want to hear from you! Tell me more. Deciding to have sex for the first time is a pretty big deal. Sexual consent must be explicit, which means that both people say that they really want to have sex. Read up on five things you need to know about sexual consent here. Luckily, there are things you can do to reduce the chances of becoming infected or pregnant. For some people, first-time sex can feel uncomfortable and may hurt or sting a bit. Medications, hormones, tiredness and illness can also have an effect. Try suggesting a different position, asking your partner to slow down, or using extra lubrication.